I Thought I Could not be BROKEN till I saw this…

I will be honest with you.

I thought that I had what it took to make it through BUDS. There was no question in my mind.

I knew that I would never quit. They would have to kick me out by some other means (which they did but that is another story).

But after the second week I began to have doubts.

I remember saying to myself “Dang, this is way harder than I thought”.

The overall work load in BUDS creeps up on you as you get more and more tired each day.

I got to Hell Week in February and really had doubts.

The water was about 54 degrees on average and it did not take long to get hyperthermia.

But I wanted it really bad — I had my own personal reasons to finish the drill.

Got to Hell Week and one night we went down to the water after dinner.

What I saw next was about to make me quit.

They lined us up on what is called the “Steel Pier” and stripped down to our skivvies.

I looked up above me and saw the infamous BUDS bell. You have to ring the bell in order to quit.

I also saw all of the instructors lined up with hooded warm sweatshirts on.

The BUDS Doctor was also there so I knew it was going to be bad.

We would get in the cold water for a couple of minutes and then get out and lay on the Steel Pier for a few minutes.

I have never been so cold in my whole life as shivered and convulsed on the verge of quitting.

I used every cold water immersion tip I could think of and even made up a few that night. Breath deep. Think warm thoughts.

The only thing that kept me going were my teammates and my inner belief that I could make it. That was my reason.

I also had realized that I was young and very dumb and needed to be humbled. At that point I was now ready to learn.

I let go off trying to struggle against the cold and just embraced it. I had a smile on my face even though my body was chilly and I was shaking.

I heard the words “get out of the water” blasted from the instructors mega-phone.

Somehow I had found a way to survive.

What is your reason to push through?  What keeps you hanging on?  What is your ultimate goal?

Post up in comments and lets hear about it.

Gotta run — heading out for a ruck right now.

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